You do not know how tempted I was to google search “how to introduce yourself on your new blog to your readers.” (If anyone is even reading) but I stopped myself with my very little bit of willpower so I could give the world what I want to give it. Myself. My pure, authentic self. Blah, blah, blah, I know…shut up. But no I will not shut up, I am only getting started. I guess starting with my name and why you should keep reading further is a good place to start. My name is Jennifer Castronovo. Never felt like my name had a nice ring to it, like David Beckham or Jordin Sparks, but besides the point. I’m here because I found this weird, calming feeling in writing.
I was never a good student, but in my defense I gave up in the fifth grade after I got a 45% on my long division math test, followed by a frowning face saying “see me after class.” Ever since then it was down hill. Now though, I’d say back up hill. I mean, I made it through, I graduated high school with a 2.3 GPA, no SAT scores, and not one college application filled out. I was painfully excited to graduate high school. Mostly because I was holding on by a thread, but high school definitely doesn’t feel short lived. Yet there are times where I have mini panic attacks thinking about how it’s getting farther and farther away, but still feels like it all happened yesterday. I had big plans after graduation, that almost everyone responded to negatively. That didn’t stop me though and I am so grateful for that. I chose to screw the social norm (in the area I live in) and to take the year off. A “gap year” a term you have probably heard by now. It’s not that uncommon anymore, but, I graduated in 2017 and I was one of five out of a class of 324 students to choose against a university. Yet, I knew very few people who actually knew exactly what they wanted to pursue and had that burning passion for it. I didn’t start this blog to try to persuade people you don’t need college, I think it is important, and if that is what you want, go get it.
I am simply here to share my experience, and all the others I will have thanks to the opening doors my gap year has given me. After the year, I went back to college. I went to my community school, I lasted one semester. I actually did so well, all A’s, met new people, and if it wasn’t for my communications class I wouldn’t have found my confusing and strange love for free writing. Yet every time I walked through the doors something just didn’t feel right. I felt like I was a puppet and like someone was controlling me. I know, that’s a crazy feeling to have.
I decided to take a leap of faith and start using this space to share my writing. I decided I would just start, because if I end up realizing further adding on my blog isn’t what I want then I can just drop it, go off the grid, and start over. I realized there is no reason for me to not give this a shot.
I am a complete beginner, but isn’t that the beauty of things like this? You get to watch yourself grow and make fun of yourself years from now saying how much of an amatuer you were. I am at such a confusing point in my life and majority of the time I feel like I’ll never get out of this situation and I know there are millions of others feeling this way to. So, here I am, sharing my journey for myself and hopefully for others that need to feel a sense of comfort is this world. Well, here goes nothing…